Have you not yet gotten your vaccine?
Is it because you worry what you’ll wear?
If you’ve been humongously hampered, I have enormous news.
As reported by the New York Post, if a killer outfit’s what you need to fight the killer virus, here’s how to get dead sexy.
Revolve.com is offering fantastic fashions so you can look like a big shot while you get the big shot.
And you won’t need to fiddle with your fabric to find a perfect place for the prick.
As talk of medical passports permeate the pandemic, Revolve’s making certain you won’t have to get mussed into a mess in order to get validated by the vaccine.
The online retailer’s serving up just what the doctor ordered: “vaccine-ready” off-the-shoulder shirts.
One click onto “Clothing” takes you “Tops,” then beneath “Trending Now,” you’ll find the following:
Per the Post, that last little item leads to lots:
[T]he tagline “Vaccine Ready”…presents 100 different styles of shoulder-baring blouses — from frilly peasant tops to body-baring bralettes — ensuring your arm is ready to receive a jab without so much as rolling up a sleeve.
I should’ve already made that clear: Sorry, tough guys — you’re limited to women’s wear.
But, hey — it worked for Harry Styles. And note his last name.
remember a few months ago when harry styles broke the internet simply for wearing a dress pic.twitter.com/0gMF4JcI09
— ivy ♡ (@pinkskissy) January 29, 2021
“Am I sprinkling in nuggets of sexual ambiguity to try and be more interesting? No. In terms of how I wanna dress, I want things to look a certain way. Not because it makes me look gay, or it makes me look straight, but because I think it looks cool.” – Harry Styles pic.twitter.com/WYQQZ2JMYj
— Eric Alper 🎧 (@ThatEricAlper) January 13, 2021
The site’s coronavirus coolness even includes a cute little quote to caw as you’re starting to get stuck: “Shoulders out for the vaccine.”
And as for the brands available to help you stay well?
Well, they’re sick:
Trendy brands featured on the page include Alice + Olivia, Free People and Norma Kamali.
As noted by the Post, the COVID-friendly category caught on in May via TikTok user @danni____cole.
For her giggly video, she captured thusly:
“Excuse me as I get my $250 vaccine shirt next-day. #greenscreen #fyp #revolve #shop #vaccine”
I guess I should’ve mentioned that as well — the tops are a bit top-heavy at as much as $300.
That’s a lot of bones to preserve yours while looking lovely. But to Danni, at least, it’s worth it.
The girl’s endorsement really got things goin’:
The video had garnered hundreds of thousands of views on TikTok before being picked up by the @Betches Instagram account, a popular women-led media company.
Okay, call the response mixed:
More than 1,300 comments on the post suggested followers were both delighted and dismayed by the fashion brand’s move to capitalize on vaccine-readiness.
“This is actually the most moronic thing I’ve ever seen @revolve,” derided one follower.
You can’t please everyone. But you can get injected while looking luxurious.
In the fight against the illness of fashion fails, if you’re in the market for a vaccine-friendly victory, you’re win is imminent.
Just like your improved immunity.
Revolve’s got you covered — but only in the places you need to be.
— Amaranta (@ajlajkitBre) March 30, 2021
Hopefully, the CDC will join forces and create a new ad campaign.
Dr. Fauci would look great in one of those.
See more pieces from me:
2020 in a Nutshell: New York Sees a Series of Assaults by Vicious Squirrels
A Chinese Master Hails the Invigorating Effects of ‘Iron Crotch Kung Fu’
All Heck Breaks Loose in Taiwan as Brawling Lawmakers Throw Pig Guts at Each Other
Find all my RedState work here.
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